UPDATE June 2011: Floral Fugitives Found!
As many may know, Greg Rheaume of Sandusky Antiques, is well known in the pansy posse as a prince of petunias. His spat with the Garden club has since stemmed some time ago, releasing him to continue cultivating his clusters of scent-imental symphonies.
Imagine his horror when he recently showed up at his shop and found absent the annuals and also the urns! The petunias had been poached! Gone were the unctuous urns so unblenchingly earned, purloined were the plantings so painstakingly proffered. Hastily he hailed the heat, but they, having an overabundance of criminality in the community of 3000, hesitated to heed his hail. As his prized pooch Millie pranced in preparation for her hourly pee, Greg grabbed her leash and they set off for the pastures.
Around the corner, Greg was upbeat to discover an unearthed urn halfway down the sidewalk. Another 20 feet lay the second urn, the would-be witless wrongdoers having underestimated the weight of the unwieldy pots. The third pot, further finishing the triumvirate, sat another half block down the road. Sniffing and snooping, Greg with his cunning canine companion Millie, tailed the trail of dirt.
“HHHhhhum” Greg huffed, then set off following fragments of the fiasco to a flat located across the street from….guess……guess…..the county jail. There on the porch sat several scofflaws’ chain smoking in front of his stolen shrubbery!
Greg announced audaciously that said annuals were the ones absent from his urns in front of his antique shop and would be accordingly applying a citizen’s arrest! Receiving various nonsensical excuses, Greg phoned the police who previously had shunned his story, and found himself on the phone with the chief himself, who reiterated that Greg was precluded from preventing the plunderers escape.
The cops finally showed up, being located across the avenue from the alleged accomplishes, took statements, and hauled the hijacked hibiscus back to their home, planting them on top of the trunk, so as not to soil the seats of their sedans, speeding the shanghaied spikes back to Sandusky Antiques. Greg happened upon his hand cart & hauled the heavy urns back to their rightful positions in front of his shop and called the Garden Club members to convey the day’s happenings, and to assure the Sow and Hoes that the pots were replanted.
The local newspaper editor interviewed him, watch for the vignette on the front page of the Sandusky Tribune this Wednesday!
